I watched a lot of Grey's Anatomy, which I know can be very secular, but it really helped me to grieve the loss of my step mom. I have not been able to do that here very much because of how intense and chaotic it is all by itself. Grey's helps me to cry and let out emotion that I normally wouldn't even dare to just have all alone. This place is just hard to fully grieve, and even just struggle. I've been struggling a lot with Jeanne's death, and more so, I've realized that Im carrying my dad's burdens. I don't know how to not do this, but Im starting to learn how not to. But its hard. And, my dad is still really struggling with her death, and thats to be expected. I do worry about him a lot... but like I said, Im trying to not carry burdens for him.
Aside from that, we have two new levels in the house, which makes things feel totally different than before. The girls are pretty typical teenage girls... all they are into and talk about are boys, boys, boys... which makes me INSANE! It also makes me really happy that I have the girls that I have. God is so sovereign, for sure. I am just so happy that God is the way he is.
I feel extremely blessed to be where Im at, learning the things I am. Its hard at times, but I am truly happy. I feel a bit better about my financial stuff, and that I have a handle on that, thanks to my awesome mentor, Rachel! And, it seems that everything is just going well.
Things I need prayer for:
1. Financial provision for the coming months, and that I have full faith that he will provide
2. Stress/anxiety levels to be LOWER than they are most of the time
3. Patience and wisdom for the new levels
4. Solid relationships to be renewed and strengthened
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